Overall, the outcome is “learned helplessness” and a sense of futility. When a girl enters this state, almost all of the benefits listed above disappear, and some of these factors become worse than the norm.

 

Why should this be the case?

 

Winning and losing in sport and play – even in the recreational context – tends to be a zero-sum situation. Someone will lose at the expense of the one who wins. It’s this very characteristic of competitive play that simulates real life, and it is the reason why competitive play is so useful in teaching real-life skills. If there is nothing at risk, there is nothing to celebrate when one wins.

  

Pretending as if we can save children from the psychological impact of losing by providing participation badges and structuring competitive play (example: sports day) where “everyone wins” and “nobody loses” is the recipe for turning children off. Children are not fooled. They know that this is gaslighting by the adults to save their feelings.

 

The key to fun sports is not to structure things where “nobody loses.” Rather, the key is to set the stage for fair opportunity for success and then let the scenario play out. Children can handle losing if they know that the parameters of the game were fair and that they might stand an equal chance of winning the next time by improving their performance or their game strategy. Children are given that chance to observe the outcome, think, and strategize; when they do eventually win under these conditions, great joy is the experience. Under the conditions of observable fairness, children can learn positive life lessons whether they win or lose in competitive play.

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Due to biological differences between boys and girls, mixing the sexes in physical play is unfair, and little girls know it. They know implicitly that the boys will have a better chance of winning when matched (unfairly) against them.

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The girls are not wrong. Research shows that girls are, indeed, at a distinct physical disadvantage, even before puberty.

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At the prepuberty level, boys are taller, heavier, stronger, faster, more agile, more explosive (in jumping and throwing), and have better cardiovascular endurance than girls.[152] And this difference is greatly magnified post puberty (late elementary to high school), with males being stronger by 25%-50%, more powerful by 20%-160% (depending upon the sport), 40% heavier, and 10% -13 % faster than females.[153]  

Research also shows that no amount of medication (puberty blockers or hormones) will mitigate the male competitive advantage over females.  

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Given the profound, long-term benefits that girls acquire through positive experiences in sports and physical activity, it is important that Alberta schools endeavor to foster programming that ensures sex-based equality of opportunity for all children. This means that whenever the curriculum involves lessons or activities that could be impacted by physical differences in biological sex, efforts should be made to carve out female-only spaces and rules of play that will enable girls to experience an equal possibility of success to that enjoyed by boys.