Stages of Development

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Throughout the developmental stages, children need the right affirmations, in the proper stages, to feel permission to grow up. If a child does not get his or her developmental needs met, contact interruption may result. 

1. In the stages of development, the “being” stage is the first stage of development. Birth to six months: In stage one, the child’s job is to be, to live, to thrive, to trust, to call out to have needs met, to expect to have needs met, to be joyful. Developing a state of trust or mistrust happens now; a parent lies on the floor, coddling the baby with a sing-song voice, taking on the role of the child’s higher power, offering good, orderly direction and unconditional love to the child for being.

2. Stage 2, six months to 18 months, is the “doing” stage where the child decides to trust others, to trust that it is safe and wonderful to explore, to trust the body senses, and to know what is known. A child is learning to be creative and active and to get support while doing all these things.

3. The “thinking” stage lasts from eighteen months to three years. In order to separate from their parents, children must learn to think, solve problems, and deal with their emotions.

4. The “Identity and power” stage lasts from three to six years. At this stage, the child must establish an individual identity, learn skills, and figure out role and power relationships with others.

5. From six to twelve years old, children learn more about structure and install their own inner structure, which includes understanding rules and the freedom that comes from having appropriate rules. Much scaffolding and skill-building self-efficacy happens during this phase.

6. From twelve to nineteen years, the youth will focus on identity, separation, sexuality, and increased competence.

7. Finally, adult development focuses on the journey from independence to interdependence, which includes a regular revisiting of previous tasks in ways that support the adult’s goals. The final stage of life, Integration toward death, is the time when elders give wisdom to those who seek it. It is a time to wrap up old business and give back to society while making peace with one's own mortality.